


A Mere Technicality

by Dark_at_Noon



Series: Operation Lovenest [2]
Category: The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-20
Updated: 2013-03-09
Packaged: 2017-11-29 22:06:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/692002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dark_at_Noon/pseuds/Dark_at_Noon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Valentines day ficlet set in the Teacher Paradox universe. <br/>Sam/Frodo, sort of. <br/>Fits in with chapter 4 of Teacher Paradox</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sam dabbles in poetry.

Valentine’s Day with Sam and Frodo

 

February 12th

Sam pulls the petals off one of his father’s daisies.

He loves me, He loves me not.

 

Sam had tried! He really had. He'd put on a film about gay people, just to see if Frodo had any reaction, and it was obviously a really bad idea, because Frodo had kept on giving Sam the side eye and then left before it was over.

And then Frodo had been so oblivious to Sam's pick up line-or, please god no, had that been a very kind rejection? - Sam's chest tightens.

The daisy in his hands is now just a stem. Sam chucks it away and pulls another off the plant. Let his Dad kill him later. Sam hates his life.

 

"Sammy? Sammy, you missed dinner! Hanson ate yours." Sam's little sister, Daisy comes and drops down next to him, twirling a plait.

 

"It's alright. I'm not hungry." Sam says. Of course Hamson ate his dinner, Hamson eats everything.

 

"Oh. I made you a sandwich, just in case. Do you still want it?" Daisy asks. She suddenly gets a crestfallen expression on her face. Sam takes the sandwich and eats it quickly.

 

"Sam, are you alright?" Daisy asks, the pout miraculously gone.

 

"Why wouldn't I be?"

 

"Well, you just ate a jam and onion sandwich, and you've destroyed Dad's daisy plant."

 

The fact that it was Jam and Onion probably explains the aftertaste. And, to his shock, Sam realises that he has destroyed his Dad's prize winning daisy.

 

"No, Daisy, I'm not alright." Sam says quietly, almost whispering.

 

"Tell me what's wrong?" Daisy looks like Halfred when she pulls that face, concerned and determined.

 

"I fancy this... This girl, this girl I know, and she doesn't fancy me back."

 

"Oh. Well, I'll get my best people on it, and I'll get you a list of things to do to woo Rosie Cotton. She won't know what hit her." With that parting promise, Daisy leaves Sam to his flower mutilations.

 

February 13th.

 

Daisy has told Rosie Cotton.

Sam knows Daisy has told Rosie Cotton because when he goes to get his English textbook Rosie snogs him. And then gives him her phone number and a time Sam can pick her up.

How exactly is Sam supposed to explain to her that she's sorely lacking in the testosterone department, but maybe if she was a boy he'd go out with her.

 

Sam's friends aren't really much help

Pip thinks it’s the greatest thing ever.

Merry just grins and scrawls down more plans for Thorin and Bilbo's secret Valentine’s Day thing.

Legolas and Gimli pat him on the back.

Fili and Kili laugh at him.

Aragorn has his tongue down Arwen's throat but gives him a thumbs up.

Boromir buys him a kitkat and leaves Sam to his thoughts.

Frodo just smiles and asks him about the Math homework.

Sam thinks Rosie Cotton may have ruined his life.

 

At eleven pm, Sam goes to bed. He wonders if he can do anything about Frodo. Maybe... Maybe he can do it old school, with a secret, totally anonymous card. Yeah, that sounds good. He gets out of bed and pulls a piece of paper from his desk drawer.

 

_To Frodo Baggins,_

_Roses are red,_

_Violets are green,_

_You're the best guy,_

_I've ever seen._

_Roses are red,_

_Violets are tan,_

_I want you to know,_

_You're my number one man._

_Roses are red,_

_Violets are vermillion,_

_I think that you're_

_One in a million._

_Love, Anonymous_

 

Perfect.

Sam made a new email address ( _[JoeBloggs1235@gmail.com](mailto:JoeBloggs1235@gmail.com)_ )  and sent it to Frodo.

He’d just have to wait and see if Frodo got it. 


	2. Frodo gets a letter, wonder who it's from?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Oblivious!Frodo.   
> Boromir is protective, and Faramir is eleven.

12.02 am, February 14th, Valentine's day. 

Frodo is confused. This is a very odd Valentine's day card. Violets are tan? What? Besides that, the only people who'd send him a card are his grandmother, or possibly Legolas, which would be disturbing beyond belief. 

Frodo shut his laptop. Out of sight, out of mind. Hopefully, he thought sleepily, the Sam/Brokeback Mountain dreams would stop tonight. 

8.40 am, February 14th, Valentine's day.   
Pippin tugs at his tie. Merry smiles awkwardly. Fili and Kili snigger to themselves. Boromir smirks. Faramir averts his gaze, blushing. Gimli yells out several lewd suggestions. Legolas is confused. Sam would give them the finger, but his mouth (and hands) are currently busy. 

"Go for a feel, Sammy Boy!" Gimli shouts, and Faramir goes a red so bright that it can't even be considered crimson, and Boromir covers his ears as Gimli yells some more. 

"What's- what's going on?" a voice cuts through the mob, and Gimli turns to face the voice, grinning. 

"Sammy's getting some." he says. 

"Oh. Good for him." Frodo replies. 

"It isn't. Stop being so disgusting, Gimli. Faramir's only eleven. He doesn't need to know what- what you think Sam ought to do with his hands." Boromir says, and walks off with Faramir following close behind. 

"I think you offended him, Gim- what is Sam doing with his hands?" Pippin looks a little bit shocked, and Gimli shakes his head. 

"That's not how you unhook a lass's bra properlike." Gimli sounds genuinely disappointed in Sam's lack of game, which makes Frodo have to bite back a smile, because Gimli is approximately five feet tall and has a proper beard.

"It is not of our business, friend Gimli," Legolas chides him. "But, as a distraction, I have brought Valentine's day cards!" He eagerly hands them out, and Sam excuses himself from Rosie Cotton's mouth, and makes his way over to the gathered group. 

Frodo looks down at the card (a picture of Legolas and Frodo holding hands, with 'Be my Valentine, friend Frodo' emblazoned on it in bright orange, drawn in what looked like crayon.) 

"Thanks, Legolas. I'll put it up on my wall." He says, which is apparently the best possible response, because Legolas beams at him. 

"You are welcome, friend Frodo!" 

"Yeah, Leggles, it's a pretty wee thing." Gimli grunts. Legolas hugs him. It's quite funny to watch, actually, because Legolas is approximately 6'4 and as thin as a rake, and Gimli is 5'0 and built like a brick house. 

"That's a nice picture, Legs. Er…is that your Dad's elk type thing in the background?" Pippin holds the paper up, inspecting it. 

"No, friend Pippin! It is you!" 

"Er, right."

"Anyway, Leggles, we're gonna be late for Diversity." Gimli says, and the two of them walk off. 

"Us too, Pip. We can't really be late for P.E. Treebeard would kill us." Merry points out. 

Suddenly, everybody else has made excuses, and Frodo and Sam are left alone. 

"Morning. How are you?" Sam asks, and Frodo gives him a weak smile. 

"Alright. Didn't get much sleep. Bilbo yelled for another hour about privacy, and then I got this really weird email, so I was up half the night. You?" 

"Same, really. Dad found that I ruined his daisy... Weird email?" 

"Yeah, like a love note," Frodo shakes his head. "Bloody bizarre." 

"One of your friends in London, maybe?" 

I didn't have friends in London, Frodo wants to scream.

"I don't think so. Still, wonder who it was, eh?" 

"Yeah… anyway, maths now, right?" 

"Yeah. So, is your mum letting you come to Legolas's party?" 

"I dunno, she's a bit funny about , well, what happened with Bilbo." 

"Ah. Well, text me if you need a jailbreak, Sam."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OF COURSE LEGGLES AND GIMLI TAKE DIVERSITY I MADE A JOKE THERE.   
> And I have developed the perfect, most moffat-ish ending for this.   
> heheheh.   
> NEXT CHAPTER:   
> Legolas has a party. Eomer and Eowyn show up. Spin the Bottle clishe? I think yes.


End file.
